Of the many REM cycles, ChintaMany landed himself as a witness in a swearing-in ceremony. He got the impression that it was being globally televised. On the podium, a lean figure looking straight into the television cameras and started to take oath of office. The mark of the land slide victory still clung to his attire and hairs. The sandy hair appearance managed to add an extra elegance to his simplicity.
What came next, simply shook ChintaMany like many earthquakes simultaneously striking at the same place. He had watched telecasts of many oath taking ceremonies. But this telecast made the cake and walked away with it. He wondered how the self-proclaimed guardians of constitution and protocol pundits would react to this historic, unique and out of the earth thinking oath taking speech.
"I....., in the name of honesty, truth and humbleness solemnly confirm that I have no more than one bank account and none in offshore or deep-sea safe havens. I do not have any pending case, criminal, civil or of any other classification anywhere in the world. Even then I have never moved a court for it to recuse or refused to accept and honour its summons, even though nothing was sent.
I have no business empire, especially the money laundering type, as I am allergic to dry cleaned clothes. With my meagre earnings how can I spend money on laundering, fashionable suits and accoutrements like diamond studded watch, imported shoes, spectacles etc.
I don't have any traffic violation citations as I don't own even a bicycle. I don't have any passport as I have neither business interests nor dealings with foreign nationals and their foundations, agencies or governments. Or do I have signed on ay n piece of paper by way of M O U or I O U.
Importantly, with no valuables worth the price tag, even ordinary thieves do not attempt raid my house and knowing this, where is the question of IT and ED officials mounting a raid? "
ChintaMany super tuned his ears not to miss out on other political gems falling out during the oath taking speech. He was not disappointed.
"I am the only politician in my family with little interest in politics and the others have stopped talking to me when I announced my intention to contest. I give assurance that allegation of nepotism or raising of nepo kids has no chance to breath down my soiled collar.
Most importantly and as a CBM (confidence building measure) here and now, in front of you all, I am submitting my undated resignation letter, now in front of you all. This is to assure that I will not cling to power when defeated.
In this letter, undated, I assure that I will vacate the official residence after 24 hr of my electoral defeat and giving authorisation to change the lock of the official residence. I am prepared to get locked out, if defeated.
Vowing to lead austerity measures, the cabinet meetings will be served only with a cup of tea or coffee and two biscuits. The cost will be borne by me and my fellow cabinet ministers, every time."
The acceptance speech was going great guns and as ChintaMany waited for some more to come crashing into the citadel of power mongers and chair-clingers, something squishy and cold fell on his person.
He sat up with a start and cursed the hot, humid weather and the stout lizard as the uninvited villains. He was sleeping with minimal clothing to beat the heat and yet somehow, he had fallen into a deep sleep.
He started to worry whether did he really fall asleep or that too was a dream?
The oath taking ceremony lingered and dissolved from his mental screen as if the projector had been switched off.
ChintaMany felt extremely distressed by the fact that the speech would have certainly touched upon policies, policing, law and order, judiciary and governance. He blamed the lizard for literally pouring cold water (squishy, cold body) on his once in a lifetime dream, which was heading towards providing a turning point and a roadmap on how politics could be, forever.
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