Yama wanted to call for an urgent council meeting. The climbing death rate and the leaner account books were not exactly tallying. This was serious and needed immediate remedial action. His consternation was that he has been watching the steady decline in his grip, over the land of the dead and did nothing to arrest the trend. Now, the decline has started to nose dive like a bird of prey swooping down to catch the scurrying rat on the ground. His number cruncher came up with a chart and on seeing that Yama scolded him for showing the graph upside down.
Taken aback, the number cruncher politely explained the graph was right and what was not right was the graph line. It was digging deep into patal loka, as if by its own free will.
Anger welled up in the extra large heart of Yama, at the cowardliness of the graph line going underground, where he expected only the dead to be buried in the necropolis.
He loudly cursed the line for showing the symptoms of agoraphobia (fear of open space) in not climbing to the horizon of the graph. At one point, Yama started doubting the exalted position and executive authority given to him – to balance the budget of living beings on Earth. Was it an eye wash to keep him at arms length or happy with his enterprise or to gradually weaken his status like a decaying radioactive material?
Then it came to his mind, that he had a grouse against Lord Shiva. HE had gifted him a Royal Buffalo, as a mascot, and chose to allow the earthlings to rear, milk and use them as farm animals, robbing him of the glory? Did Lord Vishnu play had any hand in this scheme?
Then another point that crashed in to his mind was the habit of Shiva – granting boons (Markandey, Savitry) and saving His devotees at the ‘neck’ of the moment disappointing the rope of death, darting at Mach speeds to snare them!
Yama was very proud of the rope and derived immense satisfaction that it had instilled fear of their lives in the human beings – that was decades back.
These thoughts and doubts made Yama to wonder whether Shiva was using him to further His own image as The Destroyer with a kind heart. Conflicting emotions made him to feel helpless and waited, as the scores of boiling oil pots in the dungeons of the dead.
He had introduced the boiling oil pots as an instrument of torture, to subject his ‘subjects’, to pay for their past sins. Now it was turning out to be a case of diminishing returns.
His needle of suspicion- searching for a scapegoat, pointed at Chitragupta, his confidant and aide de affairs. Can this mess be safely laid at the seat of Chitragupta, custodian of the Death Register? The memory was still fresh in his mind when Chitragupta accidently let the possession of the Death Register to change hands and the turmoil it caused rocked Yam Lok for a generation.
He was immensely pleased the way Chitragupta was shown in the movie, in a poor light, highlighting the faux passé. But other events over took and the impact of the incidence was slowly forgotten.
Yama fondly recalled the movie script where he and Chitragupta went to earth and strolled in the streets and relished on litres of ice cream, which tasted yummy and better than anything available in Yama Lok complex.
His heart went out for the characterization and costume selection. He mentally made a note to send, belatedly, a thank you letter to the director of the movie and include a congratulatory message to the scriptwriter for taking them all over the Land of the Living!
Coming out of reminiscence, he tried to focus his attention on the burrowing graph line and another suspicion sneaked in. Is Chitragupta behind all these things? He recollected the pathetic episode when Chitragupta mistimed the death of a human being which resulted in such an uproar in Yam Lok.
The victim, in splendid attire, almost caused a mutiny in to the ranks of his followers. To rub salt on his bruised ego, the human went on to deliver rousing dialogues - with the durbar in full attendance. The ignominy and audacity still rankled in him.
He was of the firm opinion that all these things would not have transpired but for the carelessness of the custodian of the death register. Loyalty not with standing, Chitragupta was becoming sloppy in his works.
The memory of relishing the ice cream melted and evaporated like the life snuffed out at his command. A not so happy recollection took its place. It again happened to be a movie in which his all powerful rope of death was made to return like a boomerang, utterly defeated in its purpose.
A recurring nightmare ensured that it remained deep in his memory. He could vividly recollect the rope of death snaking its way earthwards, travelling faster than anything a human could fly, on to the target with death written all over its sinuous length.
The target was not even taking evasive measures at the sight of the rope! Then this happens - the rope stops dead in its tracks, on seeing a talisman on the person, gets frightened as if it has seen a ghost. Presto! The rope doubled tails it back home.
As he had done in the past, he sat through the re-run of the scene at his home theatre to assess what had gone wrong? But he never imagined a situation when his own large heart will punish him for the acts of omissions – like a boring movie exempted from ‘entertainment tax’!
To day it struck him, like a bolt from the sky. His rope of death was powerless in front of a talisman, a piece of yellow or red cloth or in side the temples of Shiva or near a Shiva Linga. Now he understood the reasons for the steady decline in the business of death. The number cruncher’s graph was speaking the truth, after all, even from its abysmal depths.
On stock taking, he found that his instrument of death was outmoded and had never been upgraded with a newer version. His team remained content with bachelor degrees, in the arts of running the dungeons for the dead, instead of pursuing Masters and doctorates.
Raging inferno and tsunami filled in his heart – alternatively, usually reserved for the condemned souls in the dungeons. Carried away by emotions, he started shouting to himself ‘action’ action’ and ‘action’ like a movie director would have done at the sets of these films (his favourites, CDs taken from an illegal outlet a few years back). He deliberately avoided Chitragupta where the rope of death was shown in a denigrating manner but liked his company to enjoy the ice cream scenes.
Coming back to the reality of his misrule, Yama decided it was time for a council meeting. He found Chitragupta, his assistants, the number cruncher and the chiefs of dungeons gathered in the durbar hall. He ignored the customary greeting and straight away started the meeting, hinting that he was in a foul mood.
He questioned Chitragupta why all these things are happening? He had an unconfirmed suspicion that Chitragupta was secretly mobilizing support both within the council and Yam Lok.
“Prabhu, the human kind has become emboldened. They do not fear death anymore. Now and then, your highness has been granting lease of life. This has landed us not exactly in warm waters.
This reply annoyed Yama. “Yes, as long as some one like you have the habit of misplacing the Death Register, where else we will land. Don’t forget those times when you caused mistimed deaths?” Even now I hear the durbar hall reverberating with those political speeches. Let me ask now, why Chitragupta you remained silent?
Sensing the target practice, Chitragupta politely pointed out that not only he, his colleagues and the highness himself were mute spectators at that time. All of us heard the rhetoric in rapt attention. Yama admired his aide’s alacrity in turning the arrow in to a boomerang – it stuck.
The number cruncher had no wish to get embroiled in solving the power equations on display, happy to be among his graphs and statistical disturbances in the death figures.
The chiefs of dungeons managed to exchange knowing glances and one of them put forward a proposal on the grave issue, suggesting a discussion to work out an action plan. Though both Yama and Chitragupta did not like the interruption, each seized it as an opportunity to stop their duel.
Yama liked the word action in the suggestion – he himself had said it aloud a little while ago. The proposal was seconded and thirded (Chitragupta believed in bowing to hierarchy, so he seconded Yama’s seconding!)
The meeting continued well past sun set, the participants being fed with feast and refreshments at timely intervals. Yama started boiling up again in imagining the cost of the feast to his account. Nearing midnight, the weary council passed a unanimous resolution– no body had the strength to argue, anyway!
In essence, it empowered Yama to lead a team to Mt. Kailash and find ways to impress upon Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva , to bless the new initiatives, as THEY only can solve this problem, of life and death which was weakening the very foundation of Yam Lok.
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